All about Fraaandship …

All about Fraaandship …

Friendship is a very big word in our lives today. At times, we trust our friends more than we trust our parents or girlfriend/ boyfriend. We consult them before we take certain important decisions. We run to them when we need important suggestions or when we need a shoulder to cry on. Friendship is also a relation that you share with your siblings, your parents or for instance with your grandparents too.

It is the most beautiful relation in your life. You always have someone who will stand up for you when needed; someone who will bring you back to your senses when you are wrong. A friend is someone who can be the sibling you never had, or your second parents; someone who’ll show you the mirror whenever the need be. They are the ones who promise to stand by you, no matter what! They have seen you through all your ups and downs; been there to pick you up when you were drunk n passed out. The ones who motivated, inspired and pushed you to fulfill your dreams. They have never let you feel alone.

We all have friends who’ve been there since childhood (our chaddi-buddies), those who we’ve met in schools and colleges; even our colleagues turned out to be great friends.

But in reality how many of them have fulfilled their promise of always being there?

We have all lost friends as we have sailed through time in life, some due to ego issues, or maybe jealousy; some have just walked away never to return. You have been hurt. I have been hurt. But that’s not the end.

If there are ego issues, try sorting them. If it’s about jealousy, why not do something for your friend to make them feel special. For those who walked away, the only thing possible is being a well-wisher. Friendship doesn’t mean that you always have to be there. Sometimes giving your friend their much needed space is what is best for the two of you.

“Sometimes being a friend means mastering the art of timing. There is a time for silence. A time to let go and allow people to hurl themselves into their own destiny. And a time to prepare to pick up the pieces when it’s all over.” – Octavia Butler

Friendship is not something that you hold tight. You never hold grudges against friends, even if you aren’t together anymore. If ex-lovers can be friends, why is it difficult for us to maintain our relations?

What’s important to remember is that we all change and mature with time. Sometimes things that we may not like in our friend might be vice versa for us too. It’s important to understand each other rather than blaming one another. If we need a shoulder to cry on, we also need to someone else’s shoulder. We must trust each other to believe that in the end everything will fall in place; years of friendship don’t just vanish in thin air.

“They say nothing lasts forever …dreams change, trends come and go, but friendships never go out of style.” – Carrie, Sex And The City.


The idea of Romance

The idea of Romance

“My boyfriend is so romantic.” … “Yaar bandi bilkul romantic nahi hai.”

I am sure we’ve all heard our friends say this sometime or the other. It’s feels so nice to see couples around you who are totally, madly, crazily, insanely in love; the types that give you serious relationship goals.

So what’s romance all about? How do you know that your partner is romantic or not? How do judge the level of romance in a relationship?

I believe when a person is in love, he/she by default becomes romantic; they take extra efforts to make their partner feel special. But then don’t people complain after 2-3 years of relationship that the romance fades away? Why only relationships, it happens with marriages also at times. Romance in general means red roses, candle light dinners, expensive gifts, etc.; or rather that is what we expect from our partners as part of romance.

“She continuously gave him hints that she wanted the diamond ring they had seen at the store the other day. He wasn’t ready for it yet and said next time. But then started the problems. She said he didn’t love her and that he couldn’t do a single thing for her; that he would always think about money before her. He finally gave in and bought the ring. She happily flaunted the ring in front of friends. Her friends wished their boyfriends’ were also this romantic.”

Romance is not an emotion that you ask for. Romance is when on your birthday he surprises you with a ring when you expected chocolates and flowers. Romance is when after a long day she prepares a special dinner for the two of you. Romance is when on a weekend the two of you cuddle on the sofa & watch a movie.

There is no level of romance. You cannot measure an emotion. It needs to be felt. It’s in the little gestures that you do for each other, the time you spend together. It’s the feeling of love, the feeling that makes each passing moment special. It can be something as simple as a walk on the beach or a long drive in the rains.

“Romance is thinking about your significant other, when you are supposed to be thinking about something else.” ― Nicholas Sparks

What is Happiness for you?

What is Happiness for you?

You can’t live a peaceful life if you aren’t happy. But then what is happiness after all? Have you ever wondered what makes you happy? Is it the salary that is credited in your account at the end of every month or those new pair of heels or maybe the latest iPhone model? How about that expensive lunch at a 7-star restaurant or throwing a party at your farmhouse? It could also be buying a new car or a flat.

If you notice, all the examples above are monetary satisfactions. Today happiness for us depends on all the luxurious things that we can afford in life. I do not say it’s wrong but then give it a thought.

Are you really happy inside?

Let’s take for instance; you are working for a well-known organization, you are being paid very well for that job but then there are days when you don’t want to go to your office, or days when you want to quit the job. Why so? Shouldn’t you be happy?

As technology progressed, the definition of happiness also changed. Nowadays happiness is the picture that is posted on your Facebook wall. Unlike old days, when happiness was waiting for a picture to be printed, put into a photo frame and then be hung on the wall at your home. Happiness in our childhood was waiting for the clock to strike 5 in the evening, and everyone would rush to the playground. Meeting your friends and hanging out was top priority (not that it isn’t now, but back then we didn’t have Facebook, Whatsapp, etc.). These days’ kids play games on their mobiles.

We have lost the personal touch in our friendships and relationships. Our means of happiness has changed. We have learned to find happiness in things that we want from life. We look for happiness rather than feeling it.

But, honestly happiness lies in the small things of life. For example:

  • Playing with the cat in your building
  • Smiling at the person who stopped his car for you to cross the road
  • Someone telling you to be careful while you stand at the edge of the door in a train
  • The smile on the face of the kid next door when you give him a chocolate
  • A random text from a long lost friend
  • Sitting by the fountain, listening to music

There would be many other such instances. Why not find it out for yourself? Take a break. Pamper yourself, give your family time. Happiness is right in front of you. Feel it!!

Happiness cannot be traveled to, owned, earned, worn or consumed. Happiness is the spiritual experience of living every minute with love, grace, and gratitude. – Denis Waitley

To Do or Not to Do!!

To Do or Not to Do!!

Haven’t we all, at some point in time, faced confusion or difficulties in deciding what we want from life? We may have the best possible job which amply feeds your bank account at the end of each month, but we somehow aren’t entirely satisfied. Why is that?

“Have two hobbies; one that pays you and the other that brightens up your heart”. We all want to do what makes us happy. Some of us would want to pen down our most beautiful thoughts, while others would love to capture moments into colorful memories. List of activities we want to do and love to do is endless. Unfortunately, not everyone gets to do that for a living. Most of us bow down to parental pressure or logic. It could be because it’s out of love and respect, or perhaps we are too naive to see what we want and what are we being handed. We are taught to perform outstandingly and are expected to think out of the box or even stand out of the crowd but what we are really being asked to do is to follow the crowd.

Now the question is, why aren’t we chasing our dreams? Most of us are ambitious, no doubt. What we need to ask ourselves is that are we ambitious towards things we want or is it towards the expectations placed upon us by our peers or the society?  Quite often we are caught between our dreams and the reality. Eventually, that puts us on one of the three paths; we realize that the reality is a lot better than our dreams; or we accept the reality and realize it to be what we wanted to do in the first place; or live a life of denial that it is what we want where in fact it isn’t. This is where we sacrifice dreams and turn into robotic beings. Perhaps it would lead to success but at what cost? A life of everlasting regret, I reckon.

Each one of us has voices inside us… it is our conscience! It is good to listen to them at times. Having a hectic time at work or lecture filled classes at college? Take a break. A break has never harmed anyone.

It need not be a long one. Even if it’s just one weekend, we would do well to break free from our day to day monotonous routine. Travel, make memories, capture them. Money never stays; what stays are the memories. Make them in plenty.

Life is too short to be boring, make this ride worthwhile and memorable. Don’t we all have memories of childhood? Then why can’t we have memories of adulthood?

Today, we all have grown up, too practical and too logical. We decide our present based on our future. But shouldn’t our future be dependent on our present? Let the child in us live its life. You are never too old to have fun or live the life you want.

So don’t always give in to your parents or society or the world. Stop thinking and start dreaming. Let your inner voices do their share of talking. Feel your deepest and strongest desires. That will clear all the doubts and put you on the right path…