All about Fraaandship …

All about Fraaandship …

Friendship is a very big word in our lives today. At times, we trust our friends more than we trust our parents or girlfriend/ boyfriend. We consult them before we take certain important decisions. We run to them when we need important suggestions or when we need a shoulder to cry on. Friendship is also a relation that you share with your siblings, your parents or for instance with your grandparents too.

It is the most beautiful relation in your life. You always have someone who will stand up for you when needed; someone who will bring you back to your senses when you are wrong. A friend is someone who can be the sibling you never had, or your second parents; someone who’ll show you the mirror whenever the need be. They are the ones who promise to stand by you, no matter what! They have seen you through all your ups and downs; been there to pick you up when you were drunk n passed out. The ones who motivated, inspired and pushed you to fulfill your dreams. They have never let you feel alone.

We all have friends who’ve been there since childhood (our chaddi-buddies), those who we’ve met in schools and colleges; even our colleagues turned out to be great friends.

But in reality how many of them have fulfilled their promise of always being there?

We have all lost friends as we have sailed through time in life, some due to ego issues, or maybe jealousy; some have just walked away never to return. You have been hurt. I have been hurt. But that’s not the end.

If there are ego issues, try sorting them. If it’s about jealousy, why not do something for your friend to make them feel special. For those who walked away, the only thing possible is being a well-wisher. Friendship doesn’t mean that you always have to be there. Sometimes giving your friend their much needed space is what is best for the two of you.

“Sometimes being a friend means mastering the art of timing. There is a time for silence. A time to let go and allow people to hurl themselves into their own destiny. And a time to prepare to pick up the pieces when it’s all over.” – Octavia Butler

Friendship is not something that you hold tight. You never hold grudges against friends, even if you aren’t together anymore. If ex-lovers can be friends, why is it difficult for us to maintain our relations?

What’s important to remember is that we all change and mature with time. Sometimes things that we may not like in our friend might be vice versa for us too. It’s important to understand each other rather than blaming one another. If we need a shoulder to cry on, we also need to someone else’s shoulder. We must trust each other to believe that in the end everything will fall in place; years of friendship don’t just vanish in thin air.

“They say nothing lasts forever …dreams change, trends come and go, but friendships never go out of style.” – Carrie, Sex And The City.

Life is beyond what we believe.!

Life is beyond what we believe.!

Whatsapp, Facebook, Twitter and Snapchat. What is common in all these four stuffs ? In today’s date , these are the ultimate lifelines in order to survive the world. Sometimes, we rely on these applications so much , that we forget the essence of the Real Connect. Rather than creating memories , we kind of just let them go. A person whom we talk to via these applications is the person who actually exists in this world, and definitely not an imaginary character, so why not talk rather than chat , why not meet rather than plainly planning to meet up and etc. Why not just kill that virtual connect and start exploring the real connect?

Instead of that coffee smiley , why not take me for one ? Rather than texting me that you miss me , why not meet up ? These days, whenever you come across your birthday, everybody makes sure that they change their display pictures and put up status, in order to make you feel special. Admitting that it is quite a nice effort but just imagine this, for instance, that every contact in your whatsapp group turns up at your place and gets a cake to make that day quite special in your life.

Two situations. Two different acts. Two kind of memories. Even you know which is the deserving one.

So this story starts when I joined college and the first day happened. Things were perfect as I was meeting new people and new connections started taking place. After weeks of college, I was finally allotted the required class, where I was supposed to spend my entire first year. With every passing day, I went on building my connections and finally found my coolest group with whom I used to hang out in college. But there were some connections which existed for me , even outside the group. Sameer was one of them.

Initially, during the entire first month in my class, I wasn’t aware about each and everyone, but with the flow of time, I came to know about that every classmate I was studying with. And then, I came across Sameer. He wasn’t that typical guy whom I used to talk in my class, but there was some sort of connection between us , which made me aware about his existence. A few days later, as usual, I sent him a request on Facebook, added him on Whatsapp and followed him on Instagram. He reciprocated as well.

And , hence conversations started. The weirdest or the interesting part of this story was that we never spoke in college. He was always involved in his group and I was involved in mine. College kept us quite busy, with, not even giving us time to notice one another. But after college, we made sure that we spent some time via mediums, in order to getting to know each other.

He laughed at my silly jokes and I made fun of his photos and this went on for the entire year. I made sure that every word in my mind and heart reach his. Even he would do the same. But we never spoke in front of people.

It was just that I was quite comfortable with him and he would be with me, but only virtually. That was the point of pain. We both started believing that our conversations , laughs and moments would always exist within that virtual space which we had created for ourselves. The virtual connectivity was so beautiful between us, that we did not even think that we could have connected so well if we could break that glass of virtuality. But then things did not happen that way. And, hence, even after a year of our college, that is, even today, we are just continuing in the same way.

So mediums like Facebook and Whatsapp may help you to start that friendship with different sorts of people, but what is the point if we can’t end up meeting them in real and talk? The real conversation quite matters. Social media can be a part of your life , but don’t make it so mainstream that it screws a part of that charming personality of yours.

According to a survey report, out of every 10 people, 7 to 8 people may be quite active and sound too confident over social media but screws it when it comes to that real face to face conversation.

57% of people talk to people more online than they do in real life. And its high time that we should stop using social media to impress people, and hence, should be used to impact people.

 

And talking about Sameer, that name still makes me blush and gives me no guts to talk yet.

 

 

The idea of Romance

The idea of Romance

“My boyfriend is so romantic.” … “Yaar bandi bilkul romantic nahi hai.”

I am sure we’ve all heard our friends say this sometime or the other. It’s feels so nice to see couples around you who are totally, madly, crazily, insanely in love; the types that give you serious relationship goals.

So what’s romance all about? How do you know that your partner is romantic or not? How do judge the level of romance in a relationship?

I believe when a person is in love, he/she by default becomes romantic; they take extra efforts to make their partner feel special. But then don’t people complain after 2-3 years of relationship that the romance fades away? Why only relationships, it happens with marriages also at times. Romance in general means red roses, candle light dinners, expensive gifts, etc.; or rather that is what we expect from our partners as part of romance.

“She continuously gave him hints that she wanted the diamond ring they had seen at the store the other day. He wasn’t ready for it yet and said next time. But then started the problems. She said he didn’t love her and that he couldn’t do a single thing for her; that he would always think about money before her. He finally gave in and bought the ring. She happily flaunted the ring in front of friends. Her friends wished their boyfriends’ were also this romantic.”

Romance is not an emotion that you ask for. Romance is when on your birthday he surprises you with a ring when you expected chocolates and flowers. Romance is when after a long day she prepares a special dinner for the two of you. Romance is when on a weekend the two of you cuddle on the sofa & watch a movie.

There is no level of romance. You cannot measure an emotion. It needs to be felt. It’s in the little gestures that you do for each other, the time you spend together. It’s the feeling of love, the feeling that makes each passing moment special. It can be something as simple as a walk on the beach or a long drive in the rains.

“Romance is thinking about your significant other, when you are supposed to be thinking about something else.” ― Nicholas Sparks

What is Happiness for you?

What is Happiness for you?

You can’t live a peaceful life if you aren’t happy. But then what is happiness after all? Have you ever wondered what makes you happy? Is it the salary that is credited in your account at the end of every month or those new pair of heels or maybe the latest iPhone model? How about that expensive lunch at a 7-star restaurant or throwing a party at your farmhouse? It could also be buying a new car or a flat.

If you notice, all the examples above are monetary satisfactions. Today happiness for us depends on all the luxurious things that we can afford in life. I do not say it’s wrong but then give it a thought.

Are you really happy inside?

Let’s take for instance; you are working for a well-known organization, you are being paid very well for that job but then there are days when you don’t want to go to your office, or days when you want to quit the job. Why so? Shouldn’t you be happy?

As technology progressed, the definition of happiness also changed. Nowadays happiness is the picture that is posted on your Facebook wall. Unlike old days, when happiness was waiting for a picture to be printed, put into a photo frame and then be hung on the wall at your home. Happiness in our childhood was waiting for the clock to strike 5 in the evening, and everyone would rush to the playground. Meeting your friends and hanging out was top priority (not that it isn’t now, but back then we didn’t have Facebook, Whatsapp, etc.). These days’ kids play games on their mobiles.

We have lost the personal touch in our friendships and relationships. Our means of happiness has changed. We have learned to find happiness in things that we want from life. We look for happiness rather than feeling it.

But, honestly happiness lies in the small things of life. For example:

  • Playing with the cat in your building
  • Smiling at the person who stopped his car for you to cross the road
  • Someone telling you to be careful while you stand at the edge of the door in a train
  • The smile on the face of the kid next door when you give him a chocolate
  • A random text from a long lost friend
  • Sitting by the fountain, listening to music

There would be many other such instances. Why not find it out for yourself? Take a break. Pamper yourself, give your family time. Happiness is right in front of you. Feel it!!

Happiness cannot be traveled to, owned, earned, worn or consumed. Happiness is the spiritual experience of living every minute with love, grace, and gratitude. – Denis Waitley

Memories is all that is left …..

Memories is all that is left …..

An entire year passed and I think I was the only one who truly knew you… Or maybe I never knew you at all…

She looked back to the first day their eyes met. It was the perfect fairy-tale moment. It had felt as though time had stopped around them.

Days past; those looks increased. And it wasn’t long before they became friends. It was as if they were meant to be, their chemistry, their proximity. Nothing could separate them. With each passing minute, their bond grew stronger. They never let anyone else come in between them. She knew she had found her companion, her partner in crime. He knew she would be the only one to know him in and out. He could see no other when she was around and couldn’t stop thinking of her when she wasn’t. There was nothing on this earth that they wouldn’t talk about, from dreams to fantasies; from ex’s to crushes; they knew the A-Z’s of each other’s lives. Their chemistry was visible to all. People around would envy them, the bond they shared. But they cared less of what people thought of them. Their world was complete. Their friendship was strong to overcome everything else. She never confessed her feelings for him because she didn’t know how he would react; she couldn’t lose her partner. He hadn’t realized he had fallen in love with her.

And suddenly everything changed…………

He left her alone without saying a word. She broke, each passing second pierced her heart as those memories flooded her mind. She did not ask him for an explanation. He never bothered to give one. She felt her soul leaving her body. Smiling became a routine to hide the pain, those scars he had left her with. But he was never the same too. It bothered him not talking to her. He couldn’t get his eyes off her when they would be in the same room. She avoided those eyes. She would catch him staring at her and turn away. People then asked what had happened; said that they were meant to be.

Life had changed at both ends. To the world, they seemed to have moved on; but only they knew the reality. She wanted to tell him what she felt for him. He knew she was crying; he yearned to hold her. But an invisible wall separated them forever.

Those eyes, which were once the most beautiful dreams, now only held pain and nightmares.’

They cared, but never showed.

To Do or Not to Do!!

To Do or Not to Do!!

Haven’t we all, at some point in time, faced confusion or difficulties in deciding what we want from life? We may have the best possible job which amply feeds your bank account at the end of each month, but we somehow aren’t entirely satisfied. Why is that?

“Have two hobbies; one that pays you and the other that brightens up your heart”. We all want to do what makes us happy. Some of us would want to pen down our most beautiful thoughts, while others would love to capture moments into colorful memories. List of activities we want to do and love to do is endless. Unfortunately, not everyone gets to do that for a living. Most of us bow down to parental pressure or logic. It could be because it’s out of love and respect, or perhaps we are too naive to see what we want and what are we being handed. We are taught to perform outstandingly and are expected to think out of the box or even stand out of the crowd but what we are really being asked to do is to follow the crowd.

Now the question is, why aren’t we chasing our dreams? Most of us are ambitious, no doubt. What we need to ask ourselves is that are we ambitious towards things we want or is it towards the expectations placed upon us by our peers or the society?  Quite often we are caught between our dreams and the reality. Eventually, that puts us on one of the three paths; we realize that the reality is a lot better than our dreams; or we accept the reality and realize it to be what we wanted to do in the first place; or live a life of denial that it is what we want where in fact it isn’t. This is where we sacrifice dreams and turn into robotic beings. Perhaps it would lead to success but at what cost? A life of everlasting regret, I reckon.

Each one of us has voices inside us… it is our conscience! It is good to listen to them at times. Having a hectic time at work or lecture filled classes at college? Take a break. A break has never harmed anyone.

It need not be a long one. Even if it’s just one weekend, we would do well to break free from our day to day monotonous routine. Travel, make memories, capture them. Money never stays; what stays are the memories. Make them in plenty.

Life is too short to be boring, make this ride worthwhile and memorable. Don’t we all have memories of childhood? Then why can’t we have memories of adulthood?

Today, we all have grown up, too practical and too logical. We decide our present based on our future. But shouldn’t our future be dependent on our present? Let the child in us live its life. You are never too old to have fun or live the life you want.

So don’t always give in to your parents or society or the world. Stop thinking and start dreaming. Let your inner voices do their share of talking. Feel your deepest and strongest desires. That will clear all the doubts and put you on the right path…

Who Is Truly Your First Love?

Who Is Truly Your First Love?

“Mom, when would my Prince Charming come into my life?”, was the question I asked whenever my mother would fill my ears with those little innocent fairy tales that would talk about a beautiful princess and a handsome prince on how they met each other, how they fell in love and how they lived happily forever.

Soothing were those stories to the little ears during the childhood days, but only when adolescence hit me, did I get a wakeup call regarding the same fairy tales.

As time went by, I came to know the reality.

Yes, stories do exist, but not for the sake of a lifetime, but for the sake of the time partners can tolerate each other.

But then, for once we all dream to have that fairy tale love story where we fall in love at the first sight and that would last forever. But it may sometimes sound hypothetical or unrealistic to preserve that first love of your life forever.

Ever thought how much pain and efforts it takes for your first love to stay forever?

Yes, holding on to your first love is like growing a little sapling with a lot of selfless love and care with no expectations and waiting to see it to grow into a tree.

Recently, I came across an article on Shahrukh and Gauri. Did you ever think what’s the reason behind the beautiful couple still being together? It is said Gauri fell for Shah Rukh’s wit, confidence and style, and the two started going out. But, things were not as hunky-dory for these two young lovebirds. Shah Rukh, by nature, was very possessive about Gauri since, he did not like her to keep her hair open, let alone talking to other boys. It was then that Gauri realised that she needed a break from this relationship. A day after she celebrated her birthday at Shah Rukh’s place, she left for Mumbai with her friends without telling him. It was at this moment Shah Rukh realised his love for Gauri. Shah Rukh, who was very close to his mother, told her what had happened. She not only told him to go after his love, but also gave him 10,000 rupees to help him out. Shah Rukh recalls that he and his friends searched the entire city, but had no luck in finding Gauri. It was only after a very frantic search he found her at a beach. They both laid eyes on each other and broke down crying while in each other’s arms. That moment they realised that both could not live without each other and decided to get married.

Sometimes, it is not so difficult to hold on to your first love, but then it takes a lot of strength to hold on to it.

But then, the point is who do you think is your first love? To be genuine, your first love is not always the first person you kiss or the first person you date. Your first love would be that person whom you would always compare everyone else to. The person that you will never truly get over, no matter what.

First love is not just a random numerical position, but it is the person to whom you get attached amidst the turmoil in your life. Your first love may be the one whom you come across after a lot of turmoil in your life. Your first love may be the one whom you come across after learning a lot of lessons in life but still, the feeling would happen as if you have fallen in love for the first time ever.

Love is not about putting a timeline. It would just happen when it has to. It is mesmerising and eternal.

And it is high time for you to fall in love again for it to last forever !!